The deepest longing of the human heart is to know and enjoy the glory of God. We were made for this. | by John Piper
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another. | by C.S. Lewis
I have come home at last! This is my real country! I belong here. This is the land I have been looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now. The reason why we loved the old Narnia is that it sometimes looked a little like this. | by Jewel, from C.S. Lewis's The Last Battle
I'm wildly screwed up, and not in a cute, whimsical "I have an imperfect crooked smile" kind of way. More like really, really, one-hundred-percent drowning-in-my-sins, lost and hopeless. And because of CRAZINESS, there is God's grace which humbles me to the dirt and thrills me to the sky. There are two things that I know for dang certain--Jesus is the best ever and I am colossally messed up. | by my dearest Susannah
Life has been... um... exciting... confusing... adventurous... overflowing... bewildering... foggy... yet beautiful lately. I think I'm beginning to learn that it's only when we really, truly, deeply get lost that we realize and appreciate the gift of Christ. That He holds me in His hand. That everything that happens to me is filtered through His loving, all-powerful fingers. And there is no better place to be.
I've written before about my struggle to realize the truth that there is no peace on this earth apart from the peace of God. And God is so, so working on me in this way. I pray and ask God to make me more like Him. If I'm feeling really bold or super spiritual, I'll say take me through anything, lead me anywhere, do whatever it takes. And then, when He does, I say, "Oh.... I didn't mean that..."
So He is so patiently, lovingly teaching and pruning. You'd think I'd have learned by now. But I haven't. I'll never perfect things this side of heaven. But I think that one thing He is truly teaching me is to rejoice in trials. Rejoice in discomfort. Rejoice when I don't get my way. Because these trials are the answers to my prayer, "Make me like you, oh Father!"
There are many trials and temptations, but He is bigger than them all. There is more grace in Him than there is sin in me. He is filling me with His desires. He is changing my heart, my priorities, my loves, replacing my petty obsessions and selfishness with the things that matter to Him-- His people, His word, His Son. He is teaching me that it is never, ever okay to call Him the most important part of my life, because He should be my life.
I want so much to love Him with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength. I want a soul tethered and rooted in His love. I want a mind constantly returning to and dwelling on His word. And I want a heart for His church and the strength to serve it.
So in the midst of a stormy day in a stormier life, I can sit down with a cup of tea and edit photos and listen to the clicking of computer keys in between gusts of wind and write this. I can say, "Hallelujah! All I have is Christ." I can say that even though I have messed up hugely and maybe even five minutes ago, He has risen, He has risen indeed, and He is making me holy, and He forgives, and He is stunningly beautiful. The Gospel is stunningly beautiful.
It shakes everything up. It's like it takes absolutely everything, turns in upside down, and then, you realize that it's you who has been upside down this entire time. He is my absolute reality now. He is my all, my everything, my very identity. He is God and He is good, even when life isn't.
Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the end of the earth... whom I have created for my glory. | Isaiah 43.6-7--
p.s. thank you all bunches and bunches and a thousand little muffins for your sweet comments on my last post. it continues to blow my mind how God uses this little space to encourage people I really don't even know... what can I say but amen to 1 Corinthians 1:27-31. love you guys!





Aww, this makes me so happy to hear. when we remember that we are created solely for the purpose of his glory, we are happiest (something that I seem to be *cough* always forgetting.
ReplyDeleteand don't expect to learn it immediately. I always think I have finally learned to trust God and then he shows me where my faith is lacking. Love you, mon cher ami!
Amen! Thanks for those super encouraging thoughts. I'm so thankful the Lord is helping you keep your mind on the truth right now. You and your family are definitely in our prayers! And I love you. A lot. And I wish I could be with you to give you a hug. And I love that you quoted The Last Battle (reminds me of when I smelled a first edition of that book with you...). :)
ReplyDeletelove. you. this is absolutely beautiful and convicting.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful words!
ReplyDeletewww.rsrue.blogspot.com
This is something we all struggle with, AnnaKate. Here you've done a lovely job of expressing it so well. Thank you for this encouraging piece of writing. It means a lot. :)
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